The music was rising in this art museum in Maputo, Mozambique, the metropolis that I had been informed was unclean and violent. I had heard a lot of things, but by this point I was practically sobbing with glee, shaking hands with my new friend Ella as we danced in a circle with some of the locals. Their motions were so realistic, I was astounded!
That was just my first night in Mozambique, a location I had intended to visit with someone else who backed out at the last minute. I had been fairly frightened about travelling somewhere that I hadn’t discovered any single woman travel information for, at least at first.
I was very glad at the moment, though, since I knew if we had gone together it wouldn’t have been his scene. We probably wouldn’t have had to, the person at the hostel might not even have issued the invitation, we might not even have stayed at that hostel, the numerous ways my journey might have diverted were virtually unlimited.
The most essential person in the room would be gone, the person I am when no one knows me. The genuine me.
It’s not that I put on masks while I’m among my loved ones, it’s just that people who know us unavoidably effect how we act. It’s typically not even conscious, and of course, care must be given in picking the individuals that elevate us and bring out our finest characteristics.
This has always been true, but never is it truer than in a completely unfamiliar location when absolutely nothing is familiar.
That’s not to suggest traveling with friends, family, or significant others isn’t worth it, it is. Yet the reason I preach so often about the benefits of solo travel is because of times like these, dancing in a place where no one knows you, free as a bird.
When I go alone, I don’t have to worry about the other person not having fun at the dance party. I don’t have to remain home that night because the other individual doesn’t feel like going out. Conversely, if I choose to stay at home, I don’t need to go dancing. The beauty is that I can make the choice without feeling guilty or compelled.
Going solo means being able to be entirely selfish, and although the word “selfish” has a negative connotation, everyone deserves to know what it feels like at least once in life to enjoy the greatest party.
When you travel alone, you ask yourself questions such as,
“What do I actually appreciate?
How do I want to spend my afternoon?
How do I want to spend the rest of my entire life? »
Of course, it’s a lot of effort determining where to stay, where to eat, whether you can trust this person or should you take that train out of town to somewhere fresh new?
So, we may view it as a negative, still needing to complete all the work. But that’s life ! Isn’t it a blessing to be entirely in control? Even when things go wrong, isn’t it an opportunity to prove to yourself what you’re really made of?
Instead of fearing those moments when you’ll be alone, think about all the great things that may happen!
How many times will someone have a motorcycle with only one free view they could give you? How frequently will people be interested in you because you’re alone and they find it fascinating? How many times will they take you under their wing? For me, the answer is constantly. I don’t disagree that there are advantages to traveling with someone else, of course there are. So before ruling out traveling alone, consider about who you’ll be spending all your time with.
She is the most important person in your universe. It’s you. And unless you really know yourself, how can you be sure how you want to fit into the puzzle of other people’s lives?
I know it’s easy to be terrified of having to be the boss of issues, the boss of decisions and the boss of pleasure at every step. But believe me, these obstacles will serve you long after solo travel is gone. You’ll find out what you’re made of, and if you can look at the bad times in a good manner, you’ll also know what you’re capable of surviving and thriving in.
Just remember, the most essential person in the room is absent when you’re not traveling alone: the actual you. The person you are when no one is there to affect you. Know yourself, learn that you are more than enough.
You will be extremely pleased you did.